John 4 – Part 1: “From an Empty Life to Eternal Life”

“Jesus answered and said to her, ‘If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, ‘Give Me a drink,’ you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water.’” John 4:10

In the fall of 2019, I began to realize that I had some life-controlling problems that I could not overcome on my own.  So, I began a process of recovery to overcome trauma-based addictions that were destroying my life and my relationships with those closest to me.    

Much of my battle with these addictions involves shame. Many people confuse shame with guilt. Guilt is the conviction we experience when we have violated God’s standard of holiness. In short, guilt says, “I have done wrong.” For example, when a person covets, hates, lies, lusts, murders, steals, or commits adultery, he or she has a sense of guilt for having done wrong (cf. Ps. 32:1-5; Rom. 3:1-20; James 2:10). The Bible teaches us that sin and its subsequent guilt can lead an unsaved person to believe or trust in Christ alone as his or her Savior, resulting in cleansing and forgiveness (cf. John 16:8-11; Acts 10:43; Rom. 3:20; Gal. 3:22-24). God uses our guilt to convict us of our need for Him.

The Hebrew word for “ashamed” (cf. Gen. 2:25) is bosh, which means to fall into disgrace, to be embarrassed or humiliated. [1] The Greek word for “shame” (Heb. 12:2) is aischynēs which also refers to disgrace. [2] According to some theologians and psychologists, shame is a feeling (or belief) that we are bad, defective, flawed, and worthless.

Guilt says, “I have done wrong,” but shame says, “I am wrong.” [3] Instead of focusing on what a person has done (guilt), shame focuses on who the person is. It says that at the core of our being we are bad, flawed, inferior, unacceptable, and unworthy. One author says, “Shame is a strong sense of being uniquely and hopelessly different and less than other human beings.” [4] Satan uses shame to condemn us and isolate us from God and one another.

Let me illustrate the difference between guilt and shame. When I say, “I feel bad about yelling at my children when they misbehave,” that is guilt. But when I say, “I am a bad father,” that is shame.

We can feel guilt and shame at the same time. But shame is more relational. We can feel shame because of our own actions and the actions of others. There are two types of shame: true shame and false shame.

True shame is that feeling of disgrace or embarrassment when we have sinned. This is what Adam and Eve experienced when they disobeyed God in the garden of Eden (Gen. 3:7-8, 10).

False shame is that same feeling of disgrace or embarrassment about our personhood, not our actions. We can experience shame when we have done nothing wrong, but because of the actions of others we are ashamed. False shame says, “because of what was done to you, you are now bad,” or “this happened to you because you are bad.” [5] For example, a child who was sexually abused may internalize what was done to him or her and conclude, “I am bad because that happened to me.” Or “because I am bad that was done to me.”       

When God created the first man and woman, Adam and Eve, and joined them together as husband and wife, the Bible tells us “they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” (Gen. 2:25; cf. Mark 10:6-9). Before Adam and Eve sinned, they did not experience shame. Therefore, shame was not part of God’s original design for humankind. To be “naked” and “not ashamed” suggests something more than not wearing any clothes. These words describe Adam and Eve’s relationship with God and with one another. They were able to be completely open with the Lord and each other without holding anything back or hiding their true selves. Adam and Eve were fully known by God and each other and they were okay with this. This enabled them to experience uninhibited fellowship with God and with one another. [6] They knew that they were totally accepted and loved by God. There was nothing to fear and nothing to hide from the Lord and each other.

Prior to the Fall, they did not experience any self-consciousness regarding the uniqueness of their personhood as man and woman. For example, Adam probably did not doubt his masculinity or his ability to impress Eve as a man. He was not concerned about his biceps being big enough or being a good enough lover for Eve. Nor did Eve wonder if her beauty was enough to attract Adam or if her ideas were as significant as his. With an unwavering assurance, both knew that who they were and what they offered to one another was more than just good enough – it was “very good” (Gen. 1:31). [7]

When Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating the fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Gen. 2:16-17; 3:1-6), they experienced shame for the first time. The complete innocence and vulnerability they once had with God and one another were now lost. “Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings” (Gen. 3:7). They were now self-conscious and ashamed of their nakedness before one another, so they tried to remove their shame by covering themselves with fig leaves. They went from holding nothing back from one another to hiding and covering their true selves.

When they put their own desires ahead of God’s will for their lives, they may have realized they could also put their own interests ahead of the other’s. Would Adam be able to trust Eve after she violated God’s trust? Would Eve be able to trust Adam after he did the same thing? Once transparent and vulnerable with each other, Adam and Eve now covered their physical nakedness and the nakedness of their souls with fig leaves. Instead of trusting each other, they were afraid of being hurt by one another, so they chose to protect themselves by hiding under the cover of fig leaves.

But their sin and shame also adversely affected their closeness with God. “And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden” (Gen. 3:8). Instead of being open and vulnerable before God, they now hid themselves from His presence when He pursued them. God is presented in this verse as pursuing His fallen children by walking in the garden in the cool of the day as if this was something He had always done to connect with them.      

We might assume that God came to them to punish and shame Adam and Eve for the wrong they had done but notice that God does not seek to shame His fallen children. He seeks to restore them. “Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, ‘Where are you?’” (Gen. 3:9). Why would an all-knowing God ask Adam a question to which He already knows the answer? Because the Lord wanted a confession from Adam. “Where are you in relation to Me?” God asks. God knew where Adam was, but did Adam know where he was in relation to the Lord? Do we know where we are in relation to God?

When Adam told God, “I was afraid because I was naked” (Gen. 3:10), God replied, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat” (Gen. 3:11)? God never told Adam and Eve they were naked. This was the natural consequence of their sin. Satan also reveals our shame to us when we sin (true shame) or don’t sin (false shame). His accusations against believers produce shame in their lives. The Devil uses shame to isolate Christians from God and one another. Like a roaring lion who focuses on those who are isolated and weak, Satan focuses on believers who are alone and weak (cf. 1 Peter 5:8).

Would Adam and Eve believe God is still the same loving and merciful God that He had always been prior to their disobedience? Or would they believe the lie of the serpent who implied that God could not really be trusted (cf. Gen. 3:1-5)? The Lord did not abandon Adam and Eve when they sinned and felt ashamed. He sought them out to restore them to fellowship with Himself.

But instead of trusting the Lord, Adam and Eve were now afraid of Him. “So he said, ‘I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself’” (Gen. 3:10). Their sin and shame now became a barrier to His loving and merciful pursuit of them. Not only were they self-conscious of their nakedness before one another, they were now self-conscious of their nakedness before God. By covering themselves with fig leaves and hiding themselves among the trees of the garden, Adam and Eve removed themselves from being able to receive God’s love, grace, and mercy which He was freely offering to them. Their faith in God had now changed to fear. Unfortunately, their shame pushed them away from the Lord instead of drawing them near to Him. And shame can do the same to us today.

Like Adam and Eve, we also try to hide our shame from the Lord with modern-day fig leaves. [8] We may hide behind expensive cars, motorcycles, or homes. Some of us may take refuge behind our vast theological knowledge, ministries, or positions of leadership. We may hide behind our busyness, hobbies, humor, sarcasm, sports, or superficial interactions. Others may try to cover their shame with religious efforts and rituals like Nicodemus did (John 3:1-21). Whatever fig leaves we choose to hide behind, we are going against God’s design for us by refusing to present our true selves to Him and to one another. This never leads to the abundant life God meant for us to experience. What fig leaves are you hiding behind?

In the first part of John 4, the Lord Jesus will encounter a hurting woman at a well of water who tried to cover her shame with the fig leaf of romantic relationships. We may see God as this woman may have seen Him – as a distant and impersonable Being Who does not care about us. So, we try to medicate our loneliness and pain with romantic or sexual relationships which only intensifies our shame. These relationships may be with real or imaginary people. By imaginary I am referring to online pornography which is destroying lives today.

A man is chained to computer late at night.

Pornography is one of the most destructive practices in the church today and most churches do not know how to address it in a way that offers hope and healing for those enslaved to it. The majority of churches preach against the problem of pornography without providing a safe environment in which to address the real problem which is a deeper hurt in the hearts of those hooked on porn. Pornography is simply a surface coping mechanism for a deeper wound. Statistics indicate that 60-70 percent of men, 50-58 percent of pastors, and 20-30 percent of women in evangelical churches are sexually addicted. [9]

 “Pornography is the number one addiction for men. One out of two internet hits have to do with sex and pornography. Pornography can ruin normal sexual relationships because no real person can live up to pornographic images and fantasies. Research has shown that the limbic system bonds with whatever you are visualizing at the time of orgasm, so the next time you have sexual cravings they will be focused on that image or fantasy. This is why pornography is so addicting. Pornography is not really about sex; it is about zoning out, getting high on your own neurochemicals. Sex addicts report having withdrawal symptoms similar to cocaine withdrawal.” [10]       

Pornography is not just an adult addiction. Young people are also struggling with watching pornography online as young as four years of age and older because it is so accessible, addictive, aggressive, anonymous, and appealing. If you don’t think it’s possible for your children to get hooked on porn, you need to listen to Christian apologist and author Josh McDowell’s videos. [11]

In his book, “The Freedom Fight: The New Drug and the Truths that Set Us Free,” Ted Shimer notes the following about pornography in America in a chapter entitled “Sexualized Society”: [12]

It might come as no surprise that there is virtually no difference in monthly porn use among non-Christian men (65%) versus Christian men (64%). [13] In fact, it might even be worse than the published statistics indicate. The Freedom Fight recently conducted a survey of over 750 Christian college men from over thirty different campuses across the country. Each of the men we surveyed was involved in a campus ministry, and each considered their faith to be a vital element in their lives. Many of them were leaders in their ministries. What we found was alarming – 89% of the growing Christian men we surveyed watch porn, at least occasionally. More than six in ten view it at least weekly. More than half of these practicing Christian men say they are addicted to pornography. [14]

“The Freedom Fight’s recent survey of over 550 Christian women in ministry from over thirty university campuses across the US showed that 51% are watching porn at least occasionally. These aren’t just any college women either. These women are practicing Christians, involved in campus ministry, and many of them are in leadership positions. Though their faith is important to them, pornography remains a part of their lives.” [15]

“Two out of three Christian men watch porn regularly. [16] Many of them feel bad about it, but few of them have an urgency and commitment to break free. In fact, less than one in ten of these men seek meaningful help. [17]How can so many Christians seem content to live in sin? The answer is shame and self-deception. [18]

What kind of impact does pornography have on people? Shimer notes the following: Those who watch more and more porn do not see it as harmful and place a decreased value on the institution of marriage, the desire for children, and the need for faithfulness in marriage. [19] Research shows that the more porn someone watches, the more likely they are to be bisexual. [20] Pornography encourages behavior by producing permission-giving beliefs that say, “What I am doing is normal, doesn’t hurt anyone, and everyone is doing it.” [21] Shimer states that “this … is why many porn users – including Christians – find themselves experimenting with sexual behavior that goes against their morals, values, and even their sexual preferences.” [22]       

In addition to the psychological and spiritual repercussions, pornography consumption is also wreaking havoc on society. It rewires the brain, causing teenagers and twenty-something young men to experience porn-induced erectile dysfunction (PIED). [23] It replaces a desire for sex with real women with a desire for images and fantasy so that men are having less sex with a real person. [24] Those who view porn regularly are more likely to view hookup sex in a positive light [25] and display violence towards women. [26]        

Viewing child pornography has increased drastically in the last decade, with the FBI reporting that child porn arrests increased by 2,500%! [27] This is tragic because viewing child pornography leads to the abuse of children. [28]

This deviance that can result from porn consumption has impacted the church. In 2019, a headline in the Houston Chronicle read, “More than 100 Southern Baptist Youth Pastors Convicted or Charged in Sex Crimes.” [29]

Pornography is one of the leading contributors to human sex trafficking, which is a form of modern-day slavery. In the United States, up to 300,000 Americans under the age of eighteen are lured into the commercial sex trade every year. [30] The Rescue:Freedom organization’s survey showed that forty-nine percent of women rescued from sex trafficking in nine countries said their traffickers made pornographic videos of them while they were being raped. [31]

“One underage girl was missing for almost a year before her mother learned that sixty pornographic videos of her had been posted to multiple pornography platforms, including Pornhub and Snapchat. Pornhub described the minor girl as a ‘verified model with valid ID.’” [32]

As pornography use grows so does sex trafficking. “Reported cases of human sex trafficking in the US increased 842% in the past ten years.” [33] “The average age of a trafficked victim to begin to be sold in the United States is thirteen.” [34] “The collective billions of porn clicks per year help fuel the demand of sex traffickers who make money selling videos to porn sites.” [35]

Sociologist, Mark Regnerus says he believes the reason why never-marrieds outnumbered marrieds by 2015 is because for American men, the quality of porn and masturbation is enough to satisfy them in place of the pursuit of real sex with women. And women today expect little in return for sex in terms of time, attention, commitment, or fidelity. [36]

Porn use among women makes them more likely to cheat on a romantic partner and less likely to support traditional marriage. [37]

Researchers are forecasting that a third of Americans now in their twenties will never wed. This is more than triple the historic norm. [38]

The more porn Christians view the less will be their spiritual disciplines and the more doubts they will have about their faith. They are less likely to read their Bibles, attend church, pray, and participate in Christian service. [39]

Dr. Samuel Perry, sociology professor at the University of Oklahoma, did extensive research on the effects of porn use on a person’s religious commitments. He summarized his conclusions: “Any porn use… is associated with declines in religious commitment and behavior (i.e., attending services, prayer, etc.) and an increase in religious doubts.” [40]

While many Christian leaders are understandably calling porn the greatest threat to the Church, [41] less than 7% of pastors provide solutions to help their people break free from porn. [42]Shimer believes the reasons pastors don’t address this issue is because they are either addicted to porn themselves, [43] they are unaware of the significance of the issue, [44]or because it is such an uncomfortable topic to address. [45]

If you are struggling with pornography, contact Pure Desire at www.puredesire.org, The Genesis Process at www.genesisprocess.org, The Freedom Fight at www.thefreedomfight.org, or 423 Communities at www.423communities.org to obtain hope and healing from your addiction.         

To help us become more effective in reaching hurting and ashamed people who are addicted to porn and sex (or anything other than God) , we are going to see how Jesus presents the gospel to a hurting and ashamed woman in John 4:1-26. Let’s see HOW CAN WE CAN REACH THE HURTING SEX ADDICT FOR CHRIST.

1. CROSS OVER THE BARRIER OF PREJUDICE (4:1-7a). 4:1: The word “therefore” connects the humble and selfless service of John the Baptist (3:22-36) with Jesus making and baptizing “more disciples than John.” Jesus is referred to as “the Lord” (ho Kurios) for the first time in the gospel of John to emphasize His superiority in view of what both Johns had just established (3:28-30, 31-36). [46] Christ “knew that the Pharisees” wanted to stir up division between His disciples and those of John the Baptist (cf. 3:25-26). [47] 

4:2: John informs us that “Jesus Himself did not baptize, but His disciples” did (4:2) to downplay the spiritual significance of water baptism in a book written to tell non-Christians how to get to heaven. [48] Water baptism has nothing to do with going to heaven.   

This is also why the apostle Paul downplayed water baptism when he wrote, “For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel, not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of no effect.” (I Cor. 1:17). He distinguishes preaching the gospel from water baptism. Water baptism is not part of the gospel message because it is not  necessary for justification before God.

 4:3: Jesus “left Judea” to go “to Galilee” to avoid trouble with the Pharisees who “heard” of His growing popularity (4:1). Jesus “wanted to avoid unnecessary premature conflict with them—not for fear of them, but because they would interfere with His ministry and schedule. John never referred to the Sadducees or the Herodians by name in his gospel, because he viewed the Pharisees as the true representativesof the unbelieving nation of Israel.” [49]      

4:4: The most popular and direct route from Judea to Galilee went straight through Samaria. [50]“Even though the Jews and the Samaritans did not get along, most Galilean Jews chose to travel through Samaria rather than taking the longer route through Perea, east of the Jordan River, which Judean Jews preferred.” [51]“The trip from Galilee to Jerusalem via Samaria normally took three days.” [52]

Instead of the normal route that Judean Jews took around Samaria by crossing the Jordan River, traveling north, and then crossing the Jordan into Galilee, Jesus went straight north into “Samaria” (see map above). Such a course was direct and shorter, but Judean Jews did not go that way because they hated Samaritans. “The Jews disliked the Samaritans, considering them an unclean race. Originally, the name Samaria applied to the capital city of the northern kingdom of Israel, which was founded by King Omri (cf. 1 Kgs. 16:23-24). But eventually the entire northern kingdom was referred to by this name. When the Assyrians conquered it, they deported many Israelites, but left others in the land. Then the Assyrians settled other conquered peoples there, who intermarried with the remaining Israelites. This mixture of peoples also involved the worship of various false gods (see 2 Kgs. 17:24-41). The Samaritans of Jesus’s day were their descendants, a people of mixed ancestry and syncretistic religious practices. Thus, the Jews despised them.” [53]

But Jesus “needed to go through Samaria.” Why did Jesus have to go through Samaria when the alternate route was available? Because He had a divine appointment there with someone. Christ did not let cultural or racial divisions keep Him from addressing the spiritual needs of hurting people and nor should we. Jesus’ love for the lost led Him to cross over the barriers that people had created to seek and to save a lost woman in Samaria (Luke 19:10).

Does our love for unsaved people motivate us to cross over man-made barriers? Are we willing to despise shame as Jesus did (Heb. 12:2) whether it be our own or the shame of another, so we can help them find lasting freedom from shame? Today there seems to be more of a stigma attached to porn and sex addictions than any other addictions (e.g., alcohol and drug addiction, etc.). Are we willing to cross over the barriers established by our secular and religious cultures  to show Christ’s love to the porn and sex addict?

4:5: As Jesus and His disciples journeyed across Samaria, they came to the village of “Sychar” [54] which means “drunken or lying-town.” [55] John locates the Samaritan city of Sychar not in terms of its geographic location, but by its historic relevance [56]near the plot of ground that Jacob gave to his son Joseph.” “This parcel of land was significant in Israel’s history as a place purchased by Jacob (who was later renamed ‘Israel’) and given to his sons (Gen. 33:18-21). This was also the place where the bones of Joseph were laid to rest after Israel’s exodus from Egypt (Josh. 24:32). John’s mention of the well is no accident either. Samaria had no major rivers to supply water, only wadis (natural drainage channels), which brought seasonal rains and then dried up for months at a time. Jeremiah used the wadi as an image of deceit (Jer. 15:18). The historic location and the presence of Jacob’s well gave Jesus (and therefore John) another perfect opportunity to draw upon the familiar symbol of life: water.” [57]

4:6: John uses two Greek words to describe “Jacob’s well.” The first was pēgē in verse 6, which means “a spring or fountain,” [58] and the second is phrear in verses 11 and 12, which means “a construction consisting of a vertical shaft, covered with a stone, for water supply” [59] or “a cistern.” [60] Hence, “Jacob’s well” was both a spring and a well. “It was a deep hole that someone had dug in the ground, that was fed by a spring. The site is still a popular tourist attraction, and the deep spring still flows. Edersheim estimated (in 1886) that the well was originally about 150 feet deep.” [61]

Being weary from His journey, Jesus rested at Jacob’s well at the “sixth hour” or noon in Jewish time while the disciples went into the city for food (4:8). While fully God (1:1), Jesus was also fully man (1:14) and experienced the thirst and fatigue that all weary travelers feel so He can understand when we are parched and tired (cf. Heb. 4:15). 

“Notice that John emphasizes the full deity (‘the Word was God, 1:1) and the full humanity (He was ‘worn out,’ 4:6) of Jesus. In theological terminology, the uniting of two distinct natures (divine and human) in one Person (Jesus Christ) is known as the hypostatic union. Jesus Christ was, is, and ever will be the God-Man (see Phil. 2:6-11). It is also important to note that Jacob’s well represents common ground, since both Jews and Samaritans revered Jacob.”[62]

4:7: While Jesus was resting, a Samaritan woman came to the well to draw water. Jesus “needed to go through Samaria” (4:4) because He had a divine appointment with a hurting woman whom God would eventually use to transform an entire community. Christ was willing to cross over the barriers of prejudice to reach her.   

Who represents your Samaria? One way to find out is to ask yourself, “Who do I dislike the most? Who do I try to avoid the most?” Are we willing to do whatever it takes to reach people that no one else wants to reach? That person at work or in our neighborhood that is the subject of jokes and gossip? That person whose values and lifestyle are the opposite of our own? The person who has so many problems and needs that the only thing they can give you is a list of complaints? Ask the Lord to show you who represents your Samaria. Then surrender to His will.

Peter modeled surrender when, after a night of failed fishing, Jesus told him to try again: “Master, we have toiled all night and caught nothing; nevertheless at Your word I will let down the net.” (Luke 5:5). Surrendered people obey God’s word, even when it doesn’t make sense. Jesus “needed” to go through Samaria. You and I NEED to go through Samaria too. We need to surrender to Jesus and go to the hurting and the despised even if it doesn’t make sense to us. If we don’t tell these hurting people about Jesus, who will?

These people are not going to come to Christ on their own. Their shame has isolated them from God and other people. They are already feeling unworthy and unwanted because of their shame. They must be approached with love and grace where they feel safe. The second way to reach the hurting for Christ is to 2. CULTIVATE THE HURTING WITH LOVE (4:7b-9). How do we do this? Listen to them. In John 3, Jesus did most of the talking in His conversation with Nicodemus. He was confrontive with Nicodemus. But in John 4, Christ listened. He was compassionate. He cultivated the Samaritan woman with His love. In John 3, only three verses record what Nicodemus says. In John 4, seven verses cover what the Samaritan woman said to Jesus. God both speaks and listens. As the hurting person begins to open up, ask questions about his or her problem. Then listen. Ask more questions. Then listen some more. 

4:7b-9: Christ said to the woman, “Give Me a drink” (4:7b). His request is most effective since water is what she has come to the well for. By asking her for a drink, He goes from the problem of an empty bucket to her greater problem of an empty life.

You can do the same thing most effectively. When talking to someone who has marriage problems, you might begin by talking about marriage in general. Then mention how you and your spouse have been helped by the teachings on marriage in the Bible. Explain how you have discovered that it is the One who created marriage that knows best how to make it work. Once the person sees the need for Christ in a marriage, you can then begin at step one: the need to know Christ personally and have the assurance of eternal life. Let’s look at this woman’s empty life.

He had come to redeem this woman and He knew how to reach her. She wore the emotional armor of a woman beaten down by the morality of the righteous. He honored her closely guarded vulnerability by appealing to her kindness.” [63]

4:8: Jesus was alone at Jacob’s well because “His disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.” Their absence suggests that Jesus knew He could not be as effective ministering to this woman with the presence of the racial and gender biases of the disciples. [64]

THIS WOMAN HAD MANY PRESSING PROBLEMS:

1. SHE WAS HATED BY JEWS BECAUSE SHE WAS RACIALLY MIXED as a “Samaritan” (4:9a). When Assyria conquered the Northern Kingdom seven hundred years before Christ, many of the Jews were exported, and many foreigners were imported. The Jews who stayed and the Gentiles who came intermarried. The offspring were half-breeds called Samaritans. The Jews hated them and would have nothing to do with them.

2. AS “A WOMAN” SHE WAS SCORNED BY JEWISH MEN (4:9b). Jesus evidently asked the woman for a drink both because she was drawing water, and to initiate conversation with her.

“The normal prejudices of the day prohibited public conversation between men and women, between Jews and Samaritans, and especially between strangers. A Jewish Rabbi would rather go thirsty than violate these proprieties.” [65]

Can you imagine not being able to talk with your own husband in public? This was wrong, but socially accepted and expected. Rabbinic Law stated that “the daughters of the Samaritans are menstruants from their cradle” [66] and therefore viewed them as continually unclean. Her water bucket would be ceremonially unclean. Imagine no one wanting to touch your things because they thought it would make them dirty if they did?                

Unfortunately, churches may treat porn and sex addicts this way. They avoid eye contact with them or even avoid asking them how they are doing. Their intentions may be good, but the addict feels unwanted and unloved much like this Samaritan woman did.

3. SHE WAS DIVORCED. As a matter of fact, she was not only divorced, but she had been through five broken marriages, and now the man she was living with was not even her husband (4:17-18). All this woman knew was an unending sense of dissatisfaction. She “had five husbands,” but none of her marriages worked. They may have left for different reasons, but she was left with the same results – loneliness and emptiness inside. She tried to quench her spiritual thirst with men, but it did not work. Many addicts today who try to medicate their pain with porn and sex end up experiencing more loneliness and shame as a result.

4. SHE WAS A SOCIAL OUTCAST. She came to the well alone at“the sixth hour” (noon – Jewish time) in the heat of the day, when it was so hot she knew no one else would be there (4:6). Normally the women came later and together. Because of her divorces and her living with a man who was not her husband, she was alienated. She probably didn’t have a female friend. She was probably the subject of jokes and gossip. They laughed behind her back and maybe to her face. Like many porn and sex addicts today, she felt unloved, unwanted, unworthy, hated, and rejected. No doubt, she hated herself. But Jesus went beyond the barriers of prejudice and reached out to this woman in love. After you’ve listened to a hurting person’s problems, you will have to speak.

3. COMMUNICATE THE GOSPEL WITH RELEVANCE (4:10-26). Jesus did not take months to get to know this woman before He shared how she could have eternal life. He shared the gospel with her during His first conversation with her. The idea that you must build a friendship with someone over a long period of time before you can share Christ with them is not always true. Jesus’ conversations with Nicodemus and this woman at the well remind us that God has some people ready to hear and believe the gospel the very first time you meet them. The truth is the longer you know a person before sharing Christ with them, the harder it becomes. If I wait five years to tell someone about the most important Person in my life, they have every right to ask me why I waited five years to mention it to him.

Christ now moves from the water that could not satisfy her thirst, to the water that could. In other words, Jesus is being relevant by communicating what this woman needs to hear in a way she could understand it. They were at a well, so He talks to her about living waters (John 4:1-26). When Christ was with the fishermen, He talked about fishing for men (Matt. 4:18-20). When He was with farmers, He talked about sowing seed (Luke 8:4-15). Jesus used methods and words they would understand and value. If we are going to be effective in reaching non-Christians, we must also minister to them in ways that they value and understand.       

Evans also notes “that Jesus did not give up His cultural and racial identity to minister to someone of a different race and culture. His willingness to engage her socially by drinking water from her cup opened the door for Him to reach her spiritually. We should never ignore or reject the humanity of different people as we seek to share with them the good news of the gospel.” [67]

What does Christ say she needs to know to quench her spiritual thirst? 4:10: She needs to know “the gift of God” (4:10-15) and the Giver (“who it is who says to you, ‘Give Me a drink,’”) of the gift (4:16-26). The word that Jesus used for “gift” (dōrean) occurs only here in the gospels. [68] It emphasizes the freeness of God’s gift. [69]

Did Jesus tell her to stop living with her boyfriend to be saved? No. Did He tell her to start centering her life around God or to be baptized? No. Does He tell her to turn from her sin and follow Him the rest of her life? No. He says to ask for the gift of God and He would freely give it to her. That is grace – getting what we do not deserve.

A friend of mine had lunch with his friend at a restaurant, and at the end of their time together my friend went to the restroom. When he left the restroom, he absentmindedly went to his car without paying for his lunch. A half mile down the road he realized this and felt terrible, so he went back. When he walked into the restaurant, he expected justice – surely the staff had called the cops, or at least gotten very angry. He hoped for mercy – that they would accept his apology and let him pay them. But he was surprised by grace – they told him that his friend had secretly paid for his lunch before he left! The woman at the well was so surprised by Jesus’ offer of grace she says…

4:11-12: The woman thinks Jesus is talking about physical water which is understandable because the phrase Jesus used in 4:10, “living water,” can refer to “flowing water.” [70]  The woman asks Jesus how He could draw water from this well since He has “nothing to draw with, and the well is deep” (4:11). Today Jacob’s well is identified by archaeologists as one of the deepest in Palestine [71] – over seventy-five feet deep. [72] In her mind, such a feat would be “greater than our father Jacob” digging the well (4:12). “Jacob gave us a well” which two thousand years later still produced good water. Could this Stranger give even better water, from a well that would never run dry? She may have thought to herself.  [73]

By mentioning Jacob as “our father,” she was reminding this Jew that Jacob was as much an ancestor of the Samaritans as he was of the Jews. [74] The Samaritans traced their ancestry from Jacob through Joseph and his sons Ephraim and Manasseh. [75]

4:13: Jesus reminds her that “this water” from Jacob’s well will only quench her “thirst” temporarily so she will have to return again and again for more. Her focus on physical water reminds us of how many times we have tried and tried to quench our spiritual thirst from the same things that no longer work – relationships, drugs, our work, pornography – but they leave us feeling emptier. The old ways don’t work any longer. We need the real thing – a permanent thirst quencher. It is seen in the next verse.

4:14a: The word “drinks” means to “believe.” Jesus said, “I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger, and he who believes in Me shall never thirst” (John 6:35). “To drink” means “to believe” – because both drinking and believing permanently quench our spiritual thirst. The spiritual need that Jesus’ water meets can never reoccur. One drink of His water will satisfy our need for eternal life forever. The phrase “will never thirst” [76] literally means “will by no means thirst forever!” One drink is all it takes for this living water to permanently quench one’s spiritual thirst.       

“The emphasis of the Gospel of John is on that initial act of faith that produces this permanent and unchangeable result in the person who has believed… God gives eternal life even to those who only have a temporary faith. That’s enough to get them saved.” [77]

It cannot be undone. This negates the idea that faith must be continuous to be “true saving faith.” Since drinking symbolizes believing (cf. John 6:35), one drink, that is, one act of believing in Jesus, results in eternal life. Christ specifically denies that one must keep on drinking to receive or have everlasting life. [78]

“If you receive a drink from Jesus, you don’t have to come back for another. His living water becomes its own everlasting well. Thirst no more.” [79]

Eternal life is a forever gift because it is eternal – without end. Eternal life cannot be lost because the believer can never thirst again for it. How is this possible?

4:14b: Jesus is truly greater than Jacob because when a person believes in Him, “the water that” He “shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.” The word “fountain” (pēgē) was translated as “well” earlier (4:6) and means “a spring or fountain.” [80] The word translated “springs up” (hallomai) can mean to “bubble up” [81] or “leap up.” [82] Christ digs a well in the human heart that continuously meets the spiritual needs of the one who drinks from it, but Jacob’s well was in the earth and the drinker of it must return again and again. Men dig wells in the earth, only Jesus Christ can dig a well in the human heart that gushes up into everlasting life [83] and constantly nourishes and satisfies the human soul. [84] Jesus’ well never runs dry.

“The living water is the saving message which once received (once drunk) springs up into everlasting life. As Jesus makes clear in the following verses, the living water is the truth that Jesus is the Messiah who guarantees everlasting life to all who believe in Him. Believing in Jesus results in eternal life taking up residence in the recipient so that he or she actually has an eternal living water fountain within.” [85]

The living water that Jesus promised provided eternal satisfaction without hard work, in contrast to the physical water this woman had to draw out of a deep well by hand. [86] Christ’s living water was absolutely free! The water this woman came to the well to obtain required human effort.

This contrast between living water as a free gift and physical water as something you must work hard for is seen today among the different views of salvation within Christianity. Some say that believing in Jesus is not enough to receive eternal life. One must also work for it by submitting or surrendering to God and obeying His commands to receive eternal life. [87]

This is contrary to what Jesus taught at the well in Samaria. Eternal life is an absolutely free gift that is received forever by taking one drink, one act of believing in Jesus alone (John 4:10-14; 6:35). [88] The one who teaches anything different than what Christ and the apostles taught is preaching “a different gospel” and is “accursed” (cf. Gal. 1:6-9).        

You may say, “I believed in Jesus for eternal life some time ago but my well seems dry. My soul is parched. Why is that?” Perhaps you have plugged up your well. The sediment of unforgiveness or bitterness has stopped up your well. Perhaps your love for work or sex outside of marriage has plugged up your well. You need to unplug your well by confessing your sin to the Lord with the intent of never going back to it (I John 1:9). Confession and repentance will let the waters of eternal life bubble up again in your heart. I’m not suggesting you have lost eternal life, because that can never happen. But I am suggesting that your experience of eternal life has been hindered by unconfessed sin. Let God restore your closeness or fellowship with Him by confessing your sin to Him so you can experience the abundant life Christ wants you to have.

4:15: Thinking of the daily burden of carrying water from the well to her home, the woman cried out for the water that Jesus offered. “Sir, give me this water, that I may not thirst, nor come here to draw.” She saw His offer as a provision that would release her from a physical burden and asked for that water. Jesus had created a desire for the gift of eternal life in her heart. She saw its desirability. Now, the woman must recognize her need for this gift of God [89] and the One Who can give it to her.

Swindoll writes, “Either the woman was spiritually tone-deaf, or she was deliberately avoiding the real issue. Very often people avoid talking about spiritual matters because physical needs are easier to satisfy and frequently provide the illusion of deeper satisfaction. That’s what drives all sorts of compulsions and addictions. People also avoid spiritual discussions because they are too painfully personal. They have learned to cope with their hopelessness; they don’t want anyone upsetting the delicate balance they have worked so hard to achieve. So, the woman took the conversation back into the shallows, where she was more comfortable.” [90]

 So, Jesus confronts her with the truth to help her connect her spiritual “thirst” with her living arrangements. [91] Christ wants to shift her focus from the “gift of God” (4:10-14) to the Giver of that gift (4:15-26). 4:16: The command, “Go, call your husband, and come here,” was not intended to reveal her sinfulness to her because she was already highly aware of that. Christ’s intent was to move her towards His identity. [92]

“The woman believes that the Messiah, when He comes, will reveal all things (4:25, 29). He knows what she believes about the Messiah, and since He knows her past (and her future), He reveals His knowledge of her to make her begin to wonder if He might be the Messiah.” [93]

Constable notes, “Jesus’ instruction to call her husband was proper, because if He was really going to give her something valuable, her husband needed to be present. This was necessary to avoid any misunderstanding about the reason for the gift, especially in view of Samaritan/ Jewish tensions. In that culture giving a gift to someone implied that the recipient would give something back to the giver. If Jesus had not told the woman to call her husband, she might have suspected that He wanted sexual favors in return for His gift.” [94]

When Jesus mentions her “husband,” He was approaching the most sensitive area in her life… the area where she had experienced the most hurt and shame… the area where she had the highest and thickest walls of self-protection. Like many porn and sex addicts, she felt flawed and unworthy of love. Every fiber in her body wanted to run from this Man. At this point, she could have turned away and left (as many do), but she didn’t.

Somewhat embarrassed, she blurted out. 4:17: “I have no husband” in the traditional sense of the word. [95] 4:18: Jesus knew of her promiscuous life, which was like a Hollywood movie star’s life today, having “had five” former “husbands” and nowa live-in partner who was not her husband. [96] We do not know if her previous marriages had ended in physical death or divorce. It would have been very unusual for all her marriages to have ended in death. [97] Regardless of how they ended, Jesus was not condemning or shaming her or trying to exploit her sinfulness. He merely stated the truth and let it stand on its own. He found a way to commend half of her half-truth [98] when He said, “You have well said… and in that you spoke truly” (4:17b, 18b). How did He know all of this? She was both curious and uncomfortable. How could she pursue this conversation in a manner less painful to her? Then a thought struck her. Could He resolve an ancient dispute? Like many of us when God’s light starts to shine on a painful part of our lives, we try to change the subject.

“The woman obviously didn’t feel so threatened as to run away. Exposing the source of someone’s shame too quickly leaves him or her feeling emotionally stripped naked, and the only natural response is to run for cover. But Jesus’ timing was perfect. He had already established a rapport. He allowed the woman to see His genuine concern for her as a person, not an object. He treated her with uncommon dignity and spoke compassionately to her spiritual need. He didn’t allow her to distract Him from the real issues involved, including her attempt to flatter Him and then engage in a pointless theological debate.” [99]

4:19: A tactic that had worked with other men who got a little too close for comfort was flattery. So, she says, “Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet.” On the surface this may seem like mere flattery. But she is also starting to think more about Jesus in spiritual terms. To her “a prophet” was a messenger from God. [100] The Old Testament spoke of a Messianic “Prophet” Who would be like Moses (Deut. 18:15-18). Her reference to Jesus as “a prophet” indicates that she is focusing more on Christ’s identity now than her own sinfulness. And not just because of His insight into her private life, but because of the gracious way He talked about it with her (cf. 4:28-29). This is what Christ intended at this point in His conversation with her. He brings up her sinful arrangements with men NOT so she can become more aware of her sinfulness, but so she can understand Who Jesus truly is.  

“The Samaritans acknowledged no prophet after Moses other than the One spoken of in Deuteronomy 18:18, and Him they regarded as the Messiah … For her to speak of Jesus as a prophet was thus to move into the area of messianic speculation.” [101]

I often hear evangelistic messages today where the Christian speaker spends more time talking about the sinfulness of the lost than about the marvelous gift of God and the Giver of that gift (John 4:10-14). The importance of the cross is being deemphasized and the corruption of the sinner is being overemphasized. Such an approach magnifies sin more than the infinite Son of God and His sacrifice for all our sins!

Like the apostle Paul, I must again plead with Christians to stop embracing the wisdom of this world which perceives the message of the cross to be foolishness and human wisdom to be appealing (I Cor. 1:18-25). We think that by emphasizing the sinfulness of humanity, people will work harder (repent or turn from their sins) to get to heaven instead of resting by faith alone in the finished work of Christ alone! We must return to the centrality of the cross so our boasting will be in the Lord and His wisdom, not in our own accomplishments or our own wisdom (I Cor. 1:26-31).

Is it risky to preach the message of the cross? Absolutely. People may abuse it and live like the devil after they believe in Christ alone for His permanent and unchanging gift of eternal life (John 4:10-14). But that risk in no way justifies changing the message of the cross. God’s wisdom is expressed in the message of the cross, not in human wisdom that emphasizes our works more than God’s.

Continuing to focus on spiritual terms, the Samaritan woman brings up a spiritual concern that caused tension between her people and the Jews. 4:20: The Jews and Samaritans were like a lot of Christians today. They thought the worship of an omniscient God centered around a place. The Samaritans (“our fathers”)insisted that God was to be worshiped in the Samaritan temple on “this mountain” (Mt. Gerizim) whereas the “Jews” insisted that God was to be worshiped in the temple “in Jerusalem” on Mount Zion.      

Jesus keeps the focus on His identity, not the ancient debate between the Samaritans and the Jews. 4:21: Christ’s command, “believe Me” [102] may be more than a call to believe what He is about to say about worship. It is probably also a call to believe His claim that “salvation (everlasting life) is of the Jews” (4:22) and that He is “the Messiah” (4:25-26). Jesus announces that “the hour is coming” (a reference to the church age which will begin at Pentecost – Acts. 2:1ff), when the worship of the Father will no longer take place on Mount Gerizim or in Jerusalem. Instead, each believer in the Messiah will be a temple of the Holy Spirit (cf. 4:23-24; I Cor. 3:16; 6:19-20). [103]

4:22: The word “you” in this verse is plural and refers to the Samaritan people in general not just the Samaritan woman. Christ is saying that the Samaritans’ worship is based on ignorance (“You worship what you do not know”). Why would He say this?

“She did not know that the Messiah would be Jewish, though she knew He was coming (4:25). As a result, she did not know that ‘salvation is of the Jews.’ This is the only use of salvation (sōtēria) in John. The Lord likely is referring to the deliverance of the world from its bondage to sin. Surely, she expected a coming age in which Messiah would rule. That age, that salvation, is ‘of the Jews.’ Jesus is saying that salvation is through the Messiah—Who is Jewish—and is found in the (Old Testament) Scriptures, which are also Jewish (cf. Gen. 15:6; Isa. 53; Hab. 2:4).” [104]

The reason the Samaritans were ignorant of these truths was because they rejected all but the first five books of the Old Testament (Pentateuch) whereas the Jews accepted all the Old Testament revelation given to them by God. [105]

“Jesus insisted that her ancestral understanding of worship was flawed, and that salvation is from the Jews (4:22) because the Messiah would be of Jewish lineage, descended from the tribe of Judah. Jesus made it clear that truth trumps race and culture.” [106] 

4:23: Jesus says, “the hour is coming” after His death and resurrection, “and now is,” because the Messiah is present with her at that moment, [107] “when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth.” God the Father “is seeking” people of all ethnicities, not just the Jews or Samaritans, to “worship Him” with their hearts (“in spirit”) and with their heads (“in truth”). Both the Jews and Samaritans of Jesus’ day paid close attention to detail and form in worship but neglected to nurture a heart attitude towards the Lord. [108] 4:24: We were created to have our spirits connect with “God” Who “is Spirit.”  To worship God “in truth” is to worship Him the way His Word instructs us (John 17:17) – through the One Who is “the truth” (John 14:6; cf. 5:23). God is seeking those who will connect with Him spiritually through His Son, Jesus Christ, based on the truth of His Word.

Today it is difficult to find a church that maintains a healthy balance in the worship of God with their hearts (“in spirit) and with their heads (“in truth”). The tendency is to lean more toward one of these approaches instead of both. Favoring either to an extreme can result in the chaos of emotionalism and sensationalism (“in spirit) or the coldness of cerebralism and stoicism (“in truth”). Finding and maintaining a healthy balance requires focusing on both the Holy Spirit and God’s Word (cf. John 14:17; 15:26; 16:13; 17:17; Ephes. 5:9, 18-20; Col. 3:16-17).

“Many people today associate worship primarily with going to church, as the Jews did with going to Jerusalem. Jesus clarified that true worship transcends any particular time or place. We can and should worship God twenty-four hours a day as we set aside (sanctify) every activity as an expression of our love and service for the Lord.” [109]       

This Prophet-like Man Who was all too familiar with her sin-stained life spoke of worship as if it pertained to her and her fellow Samaritans. The woman may have thought, “Could I be one of those whom God seeks to worship Him? But how could I ever approach the infinite and eternal Spirit Who desires my worship? My own spirit is soiled by the sinfulness of my life. And it is hopelessly dried up by the emptiness of dissatisfying relationships.”

Then she remembered: “He offered me living water that gushes up into eternal life. Life that will bring me into contact with the living God, washing away the emptiness of my life. Now she had to ask Him a question. He had said that ‘Salvation was of the Jews.’ And He was a Jew and He had offered me eternal life if I would ask Him for it. Could He be …? Was He the Messiah?” [110]

4:25a: She hesitated to put the question directly, but Jesus’ words and wisdom caused her to think of the“Messiah … who is called the Christ.”  4:25b: Her words, “He will tell us all things” suggest that she is wondering if “that Messiah” could tell her more than this Man about her life and worship? She was asking Him for the living water (4:10). She was ready for the answer and Jesus gave it to her.

4:26: “Jesus said to her, ‘I who speak to you am He.’” In the Greek language, it literally reads,“I am [He] the [One] speaking to you.” [111] The phrase “I am” (Egō eimi) is emphatic in this statement and it connects us to God’s self-identification to Moses. “I AM WHO I AM.” (Exod. 3:14).

“Both Jews and Samaritans understood Jesus’ meaning. In fact, the religious leaders accused Jesus of blasphemy for claiming to be God because of His repeated use of the ‘I am’ formula (6:48; 8:18, 24, 28, 58; 10:7, 11; 11:25; 13:19; 14:6; 15:1-3; 18:5-8).” [112]

Yes, the light of truth flooded the Samaritan woman’s soul. She had arrived at the well empty, but now she departed full of life – life with God forever. She now knew the Gift and the Giver. And that is all she needed to know. That is all anyone needs to know. And when they do, an eternal transaction occurs. Without a word or prayer, her heart had asked, and He had given her eternal life.

This tells us that no one is too bad to receive the gift of God. Perhaps you can relate to the Samaritan woman. Your life is empty and parched. You have tried to fill it with substitutes – relationships, alcohol, drugs, pornography, your work, special projects, etc., but they leave you feeling emptier. You need the real thing – a permanent thirst quencher. Ask Jesus for the gift of eternal life and He will give it to you right now.

Although the Samaritan woman sought romantic relationships with men to avoid her shame, Jesus graciously spoke the truth to her in a way that gave her dignity, not more shame. How do we know this? Because after her conversation with Jesus, she goes back to her village and says to the people, “Come, see a Man who told me all things that I ever did. Could this be the Christ?”(4:29). Would she have invited people to come see Jesus if He had shamed her or bullied her? No. Jesus knew all about the shameful things she had done, yet He still loved her. No one ever treated her with such dignity. Jesus spoke to her in a way that brought healing and hope to her heart. He spoke to her in a way that removed her shame and filled her with His love.

And He wants to do the same with you and with me. Are you willing to invite Jesus to come in to the dark and wounded parts of your soul to shine His light of love and heal your brokenness? You may have shameful secrets deep in your soul that you have shared with no one. Jesus already knows what those secrets are, and He is not upset with you.      

Jesus tells us that His heart is “gentle and lowly” (Matt. 11:29). When in the temple, Jesus read Isaiah 42:3 which described the coming Messiah: “A bruised reed He will not break, and smoking flax He will not quench.” (Matt. 12:20). Jesus, the Messiah, will not treat those of us who are “bruised” with sin and shame harshly (“break” them). He comes along side of us to strengthen and heal us with His presence rather than step on us to advance His own plans. He will not “quench” what little hope (“smoking flax”) we have left inside of us. He wants to rekindle our love and passion for Him and for life itself. He does this with His gentle and gracious presence in our lives which heals our wounds and replaces our shame with dignity. The woman at the well experienced this when she met Jesus, and her life was forever changed as we shall see in the next chapter.

Prayer: Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You now as a broken sinner who has been deeply hurt by my own sinful choices and the sinful choices of others. I have tried to satisfy my spiritual thirst with so many substitutes that have only made my life worse. I realize today that You still love me despite all of the pain I have caused You and others. I believe You died in my place for all my sins on a cross and rose from the dead. Right now I am asking You, Lord Jesus, to give me everlasting life as a free gift. Thank You for the everlasting life I now have which satisfies my spiritual thirst forever. Thank You that I can never lose this precious gift. Please help me to cross over man-made barriers to share Your life-giving gospel message with people regardless of their culture, color of skin, country, or condition. Please lead me to my Samaria – to those people no one else wants to reach with Your gospel message. I pray for Your boldness, clarity, and compassion as I communicate Your life-giving message to them. In Your mighty name I pray, Lord Jesus. Amen.

FOOTNOTES:

[1] Francis Brown, S. R. Driver, Charles A. Briggs, A Hebrew and English Lexicon of the Old Testament (Omaha, NE: Patristic Publishing, 2020 Kindle Edition), pp. 381-383.

[2] Walter Bauer, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature: Third Edition revised and edited by Frederick William Danker (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2000 Kindle Edition), pg. 30.

[3] Michael John Cusick, Surfing for God (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2012), pg. 67.

[4] Sandra D. Wilson, Released from Shame: Revised Edition (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002), pg. 23.

[5] https://www.ibelieve.com/faith/the-important-difference-between-guilt-and-shame.html.

[6] Cusick, Surfing for God, pg. 68.

[7] Ibid., pg. 69.

[8] Ibid., pg. 71.

[9] Jeremy & Tiana Wiles, Conquer Series Study Guide Volume 1 (Stuart, FL: KindgomWorks Studios, 2017), pg. 21.

[10] Michael Dye, The Genesis Process: For Change Groups Books 1 and 2 Individual Workbook (Michael Dye/Double Eagle Industries, 2012), pp. 206-207.

[11] See Christian apologist and author Josh McDowell’s very informative and staggering videos on October 7, 2018 at Denton Bible Church entitled, “Breaking Free from the Porn Epidemic w/ Josh McDowell” at https://vimeo.com/294241982 and on August 3, 2021 with Pure Desire Ministries entitled, “The Effects of Pornography with Josh McDowell” at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3sRmLFarZc .

[12] Adapted from Ted Shimer, The Freedom Fight: The New Drug and the Truths that Set Us Free (Houston: High Bridge Books, 2020), pp. 122ff.

[13] Ibid., pg. 20 cites Proven Men Porn Survey (conducted by Barna Group), located at https://provenmen.org/2014PornSurvey/

[14] Ibid., pg. 21 cites 2019 Freedom Fight national Christian student survey involving over 550 women and 750 men from over 30 Universities across the U.S.

[15] Ibid.

[16] Ibid., pg. 58 cites 2014 Barna Group Survey at https://wwwprovenmen.org/pornography-survey-statistics-2014/

[17] Ibid., pg. 58, also Shimer states on pg. 334, footnote #2, “Dr. Ted Roberts, the Founder of Pure Desire ministry and Host of the Conquer Series, who had helped people for over thirty years find freedom from pornography, in a correspondence on July 5, 2019, estimated that less than 10% of Christian men who are struggling with porn are seeking recovery in a meaningful way. He believes shame is the biggest factor keeping believers in the shadows.”

[18] Ibid., pg. 58. Shimer also cites Dr. Samuel Perry who said in his July 3, 2019, email correspondence that his research led him to believe that Christian women under-report their porn use because of shame (pg. 334).

[19] Ibid., pg. 22-25 cites Dolf Zillman and Jennings Bryant (1988) Pornography’s impact on sexual satisfaction. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 18, 438-453. Doi: 10.1111/j.1559-1988.tb00027.x https://profiles.nlm.nih.gov/ps/access/nnbckv.pdf Effects of Prolonged Consumption of Pornography Dolf Zillman Layden, M. A. (2010); Pornography And Violence: A New Look At The Research, in J. Stoner & D. Huges (eds.); Dr. Mary Layden, Presentation at the Set Free Summit, April 2016; The Porn Phenomenon, Barna Group, https://www.barna.com/research/porn-in-the-digital-age-new-research-reveals-10-trends/

[20] Ibid., pp. 24-25 cites The Report on Digital Sexuality 2019, https://www. yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-porn-use-faqs/is-my-fetish-porn-induced/the-more-porn-you-watch-the-more-likely-you-are-to-be-bisexual-study-2019.

[21] Ibid., pg. 25 cites Layden, Presentation at the Set Free Summit, April 2016.

[22] Ibid.

[23] Ibid., pp. 27-29 cites inability to climax a result of porn, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5039517/, Behav Sci (Basel). 2016 Set; 6(3): 17, Published online 2016 Aug 5. doi:10.3390/bs6030017, Is internet Pornography Causing Sexual Dysfunctions? A review with Clinical Reports; TIME, April 2016, Why young men who grew up on internet porn are becoming advocates of turning it off; Dr. Abraham Morgentaler, who’s the clinical professor of urology at Harvard Medical School, says that many young men today suffer from what he calls porn-induced erectile dysfunction. These men are young, healthy men that can’t maintain an erection with the person that they’re with sexually. But they can get an erection watching porn, https:www.covenanteyes.com/2015/02/27/porn-cause-erectile-dysfunction/?_ga=2.193688685.1717636998.158773822-929581036.1558531859; A 2016 study on Canadian adolescents showed that 45.3% admitted to problems in erectile functioning, https://www.jahonline.org/article/S1054-139X(16)30056-8/fulltext

[24] Ibid., pp. 28-29 cites survey showing Americans not having sex tripled in the last 10 years, https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/03/29/share-americans-not-having-sex-has-reached-record-high/?utm_term=.4d7d002bb327; Playboy, Interview, John Mayer, February 10, 2010.

[25] Ibid., pg. 29 cites D. Zillman & J. Bryant (1988), Pornography’s impact on sexual satisfaction, Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 18, 438-453; Mark Regnerus, Cheap Sex: The Transformation of Men, Marriage, and Monogamy., (New York, NY: Oxford University Press, 2017), pp. 95-98 (sexual hookups).

[26] Ibid., pp. 32-33 cites The Brain That Changes Itself, Renowned psychiatrist Dr. Norman Doide says of one of his porn-addicted patients, “His feeling that sexual intercourse was a violent act upset him greatly, yet excited him. Thoughts of sexual intercourse immediately led to thoughts of violence and thoughts of violence to sex.”; Anna Bridges, A study of the twenty-five most popular pornographic movies; Foubert, over one hundred studies have shown pornography use increases the likelihood that a man will commit violence against a woman, Malamuth, N. M; Addison, T.; & Koss, M. P. (200), Pornography and sexual aggression: Are there reliable effects and can we understand them? Annual Review of Sex Research, 11, 26-91; increase in sexual violence, https://www.nbcchicago.com/news/national-international/FBI-Report-Shows-Almost-20-Percent-Increase-in-Rape-Reports-495065881.html

[27] Ibid., pg. 33 cites https://www.thetrumpet.com/17188-pedophilia-is-more-common-than-you-think

[28] Ibid., cites 85% of those arrested for Child porn admit to abusing children, https://innocentjustice.org/know-more/

[29]Ibid., cites https://www.houstonchronicle.com/news/investigations/article/All-too-often-Southern-Baptist-youth-pastors-13588292.php

[30] Ibid., pg. 35 cites https://arkofhopeforchildrenorg/child-trafficking/child-trafficking-statistics

[31] Ibid., https://fightthenewdrug.org/by-the-numbers-porn-sex-trafficking-connected/

[32] Ibid., cites Anti-Pornhub petition gains steam, accuses adult video giant of facilitating sex trafficking, https://www.foxnews.com/faith-values/anti-pornhub-petition-sex-trafficking

[33] Ibid., cites https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/washington-secrets/human-sex-trafficking-up-842-california-leads

[34] Ibid., cites http://fortune.com/2019/04/14/human-sex-trafficking-us-slavery

[35] Ibid., pg. 36 cites https://fightthenewdrug.org/by-the-numbers-porn-sex-trafficking-connected/

[36] Ibid., pp. 36-37 cites https://www.wsj.com/articles/cheap-sex-and-the-deline-of-marriage-1506690454?mod=djcm_OBV1_092216&Paid&nan_pid=1864075905&ad_id=8030479

[37] Ibid., pg. 37 cites Regnerus, Cheap Sex, pg. 128.

[38] Ibid., cites Regnerus, Cheap Sex, pg. 121.

[39] Ibid. pp. 62-66.

[40] Ibid., pg. 62 cites Seeing is (Not) Believing: How Viewing Pornography Shapes the Religious Lives of Young Americans, Samuel L. Perry, George M. Hayward, https://academic.oup.com/sf/article/95/4/1757/2877697

[41] Ibid., pg. 87. Shimer also states that over half of pastors say porn addiction is the most damaging issue in their congregation, citing https://www.charismnews.com/us/73208-15-statistics-about-the-church-and-pornography-that-will-blow-your-mind (pg. 338).

[42] Ibid., pg. 89 cites Barna Survey at  https://www.charismnews.com/us/73208-15-statistics-about-the-church-and-pornography-that-will-blow-your-mind

[43] Shimer notes that two separate anonymous surveys showed half of pastors struggle with pornography (pg. 89). He cites on pg. 338 that a 2002 Pastors.com anonymous survey of over 1,300 pastors showed that 54% viewed porn in the last 12 months and 30% last month. He also cites Samuel L. Perry’s 2019 book Addicted to Lust (pg. 30), where Perry states that an anonymous survey by Promise Keepers showed that 54% of pastors had viewed porn in the last seven days.

[44] Ibid., pp. 89-91.

[45] Ibid., pp. 91-92. It must be noted that Shimer does an excellent job addressing how to overcome these obstacles on pages 92-99. This is well worth your time to look over especially if you are wanting to see your church be part of the solution and not part of the problem concerning pornography.

[46] Tom Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, 2023 Edition, pg. 119.

[47] J. Dwight Pentecost, The Words and  Works of Jesus Christ (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1981), pg. 131.

[48] Zane C. Hodges, Faith in His Name: Listening to the gospel of John (Corinth, TX: Grace Evangelical Society, 2015), pg. 74.

[49] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 118.

[50] Ibid., pg. 119 cites Jack Finegan, Light from the Ancient Past: The Archeological Background of Judaism and Christianity. 2nd ed. (Princeton University Press. London: Oxford University Press, 1959), pp. 309-311.

[51] Ibid., cites Flavius Josephus, Antiquities of the Jews, 20:6:1; Edersheim, The Life and Times of Jesus the Messiah, Vol. 1, pg. 394.

[52] Ibid., cites Flavius Josephus, The Life of Flavius Josephus, par. 52.

[53] Tony Evans, CSB Bibles by Holman, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary (B&H Publishing Group, 2019 Kindle Edition), pp. 2210-2211.

[54] Sychar

[55] Archibald Thomas Robertson,. A. T. Robertson’s Word Pictures in the New Testament [with Bible and Strong’s Numbers Added!], 6 Volumes E4 Group, 2014 Kindle Edition), Kindle Location 53954.

[56] Charles R. Swindoll, Insights on John, Swindoll’s Living Insights New Testament Commentary Book 4 (Tyndale House Publishers, 2014 Kindle Edition), pg. 89.

[57] Ibid.

[58] Bauer, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament, pg. 810.

[59] Ibid., pg. 1065;

[60] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 120.

[61] Ibid., pp. 120-121 cites Edersheim, The Life and Times of Jesus the Messiah, Vol. 1, pg. 404. 

[62] Evans, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, pg. 2211.

[63] Swindoll, Insights on John, pg. 90.

[64] Evans, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, pg. 2211.

[65] Edwin A. Blum, The Bible Knowledge Commentary Gospels Editors John F. Walvoord and  Roy B. Zuck (David C Cook, 2018 Kindle Edition), pg. 573.

[66] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 121 cites the Mishnah Niddah 4:1.

[67] Evans, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, pg. 2212.

[68] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 122.

[69] Zane C. Hodges, The Hungry Inherit: Winning the Wealth of the World to Come (Corinth, TX: Grace Evangelical Society, 2016 Kindle Edition), pp. 6-14.

[70] J. Carl Laney, Moody Gospel John Commentary (Chicago: Moody Press, 1992), pg. 93.

[71] Blum, The Bible Knowledge Commentary Gospels, pg. 575.

[72] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 124.

[73] Robert Wilkin, Bond, J.; Derickson, Gary; Doskocil, Brad; Hodges, Zane; Hunt, Dwight; Leach, Shawn. “John.” The Grace New Testament Commentary: Revised Edition (Grace Evangelical Society, 2019 Kindle Edition), pg. 188.

[74] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 124.

[75] Robertson, A. T. Robertson’s Word Pictures, Kindle Location 54300.

[76] ou mē dipsēsē eis ton aiōna

[77] Zane C. Hodges with Robert N. Wilkin, Tough Texts: Did Jesus Teach Salvation by Works? (Denton, TX: Grace Evangelical Society, 2017 Kindle Edition), pp. 106-107.

[78] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 188.

[79] Evans, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, pg. 2212.

[80] Bauer, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament, pg. 810.

[81] Ibid., pg. 46.

[82] Robertson, A. T. Robertson’s Word Pictures, Kindle Location 54361 to 54384.

[83] Hodges, The Hungry Inherit, pg. 8.

[84] Pentecost, The Words and Works of Jesus Christ, pg. 133.

[85] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 188.

[86] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pp. 124-125.

[87] John F. MacArthur, Hard to Believe: The High Cost and Infinite Value of Following Jesus (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2003), pg. 93; John Piper, Beyond the Gold, Desiring God Radio, May 14, 2006.

[88] See Zane C. Hodges excellent book, Absolutely Free! A Biblical Reply to Lordship Salvation (Dallas: Redencion Viva, and Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, Academie Books, 1989).

[89] Pentecost, The Words and Works of Jesus Christ, pg. 133.

[90]  Swindoll, Insights on John, pg. 92.

[91] Ibid.

[92] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 188.

[93] Ibid.

[94] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 125.

[95] Ibid.

[96] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 188.

[97] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 125.

[98] Swindoll, Insights on John, pg. 92.

[99] Ibid., pg. 93.

[100] Pentecost, The Words and Works of Jesus Christ, pg. 133.

[101] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 126 cites Morris, The Gospel According to John, pg. 236. Cf. Edersheim, The Life and Times of Jesus the Messiah Vol. 1, pg. 414.

[102] pisteuson Moi 

[103] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 188.

[104] Ibid., pp. 188-189.

[105] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pp. 127-128; cf. Laney, Moody Gospel John Commentary, pg. 96.  

[106] Evans, The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, pg. 2213.

[107] Ibid.

[108] Wilkin, The Grace New Testament Commentary, Kindle Edition, pg. 189.

[109] Constable, Dr. Constable’s Notes on John, pg. 130 cites Rick Warren, The Purpose-Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For? (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 2002), pp. 77-84.

[110] Hodges, The Hungry Inherit, pp. 10-11.

[111] Egō eimi, ho lalōn soi.

[112] Swindoll, Insights on John, pg. 94.

Appendix 5 – Hindrances to Forgiveness Exercise

This exercise is adapted from Michael Dye’s The Genesis Process. [1]

All of us have been hurt and wounded by others, especially those we trusted. From beginning to end, the Bible emphasizes the importance of forgiveness. God even commands us to forgive (Ephes. 4:32). Therefore, Jesus taught us to pray, 12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors… 14 For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (Matt. 6:12, 14-15). Forgiveness is so important because it is connected to God’s forgiveness of us. I cannot enjoy fellowship or closeness with God the Father if I am not willing to forgive those who have hurt me. Being unforgiving connects us to our past hurts and makes it difficult to fully enjoy the blessings of our relationship with God and with other people.

One of the ways we can know we have not forgiven someone is we keep rehearsing bitter and defensive thoughts toward those who have hurt us. We keep going “back to court” in our minds with all the things we wish we had said or want to say to them. [2] God invites us to release the hurt others have caused to us. Forgiveness requires the cancelling of a debt (cf. Matt. 18:21-35). Perhaps the person who has hurt us owes us an apology, justice, money, repentance, restoration, suffering, understanding, etc. God wants us to cancel the debt they owe us.

There are three things that can hinder us from forgiving others: judgments, vows, and false beliefs. [3] When someone hurts us, we can hold on to judgments about them out of fear. We don’t realize it, but our judgments are an attempt to protect ourselves from painful memories associated with our abusers. We may judge their motives and try to read their minds. We tell ourselves, “He or she is evil, selfish, and does not care about me or love me.” Christ warns us about making such judgments (Matt. 7:1-2). These judgments can cause heart wounds that keep us from healing and growing. When we refuse to forgive that person, we can bind ourselves to the person we are judging and become more like that person.It is important to repent or change our minds about our judgments and ask God to release the person and ourselves from the consequences. [4]

Not only do judgments about our offenders hinder us from forgiving them, but so do the vows we make. Jesus opposed the practice of distorting vows so they could convey or conceal a lie (Matt. 5:33-35). We can make inner vows to survive the hurts we have suffered. For example, when a person I trusted hurts me, I may make an inner vow that says, “I will never trust anyone again!” Or “If I need others, they will take advantage of me!” These types of vows can become self-curses that result in isolation and loneliness, which cause us even more pain. These inner vows can often become subconscious and do not disappear with time. They are like a contract that must be renounced or broken. It is important to ask God to forgive us and break these vows we have made. [5]

False beliefs or lies can also prevent us from forgiving others. We may tell ourselves, “If I forgive them, they will get off the hook and there will never be any justice.” But the truth is, only God knows what is just (Rom. 12:19). Or “If I forgive, I will become vulnerable to them again.” The truth is that just because you forgive them does not mean that they are safe, and you must trust them again. They must earn your trust. For reconciliation on a horizontal level to take place, the perpetrator must apologize, repent or change his mind and behavior, and ask for forgiveness (Matt. 18:15-18; Luke 17:3-4). [6]

Forgiveness is so important because it gives us the ability to move on in life. Being unforgiving connects us to our past hurts and makes it difficult to receive the blessings of new relationships. Forgiveness occurs when the one who was wounded cancels the debt owed to him or her. When we forgive, we are free from those who hurt us. [7]

If you are struggling to forgive your perpetrator(s), take some time today to do this exercise: [8]

1. Ask God to reveal to you the people who have hurt you. Make a list. Start with those closest to you (e.g., your parents, siblings, spouse, children, or a close friend; etc.). Do the exercise with them one at a time. Think about the people whom you still “go back to court with” in your mind: 

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

2. Wounds: What he or she did to you that hurt you:  abandoned, abused, betrayed, criticized, lied, misrepresented, neglected, rejected, etc. What was the wound(s)?

 ______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

3. Judgments (Matt. 7:1-2): The things you believe about them: e.g., they are evil, lazy, selfish, stupid, weak, didn’t love me, didn’t care for me, etc.). What are your judgments?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

Repent of these judgments and ask God to release the person and yourself from the consequences (Matt. 7:1-2).

4. Vows (Matt. 5:33-35): Vows can be like self-cures, promises you told yourself to survive the wound(s), e.g.,“I don’t need or trust anyone,” or “whatever I do, it won’t be enough,” or “all men/women are ______,” etc.

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

Renounce and repent of these vows, asking God to forgive you and to break them.

5. Effect on You: What effect did the wound have on you (How did you cope)? Addiction, anger, anxiety, codependency, depression, food, isolation, stress, workaholism, etc.?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

6. Their Debt: What debt do they owe you? What would they have to do for you to trust them again? Apologize, change their behavior, experience humiliation, justice, make restitution, money, repent, seek your forgiveness, suffer, etc.

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

Talk to the Lord, asking Him to make you both willing and able to cancel their debt as He has already cancelled yours to Him through Christ (Matt. 18:23-33; Ephes. 4:32).

7. False Beliefs. What false belief or lie is keeping you from forgiving them? Say the following false beliefs below to yourself to see if they feel true. If they do, then meditate on the true beliefs until the false beliefs no longer feel true. There are blank spaces at the end where you can write in the false belief(s) and true belief(s) that are not on the list.

False belief: If I forgive them, they will get off the hook and there will never be any justice.

True belief: Only God knows what is just (Rom. 12:19).

False belief: Forgiveness means I must pretend that nothing ever happened.

True belief: Forgiveness is not denial. You must tell yourself the truth about what they did and how it affected you to really be able to forgive them from the heart (Matt. 18:35; John 8:32).

False belief: If I forgive, I will become vulnerable to them again.

True belief: Just because you forgive them doesn’t mean that they are safe, and you must trust them again (Matt. 18:15-18; Luke 17:3-4).

False belief: My unforgiveness punishes them and is justified because I am right; they will never see their wrong and repent if I let go.

True belief: The truth is, it is God’s mercy and kindness that leads us to repentance. Only He knows what will change them (Rom. 2:4; Ephes. 4:24-32).

False belief: _____________________________________________

_____________________________________________

True belief: _____________________________________________

_____________________________________________

False belief: _____________________________________________

_____________________________________________

True belief: _____________________________________________

_____________________________________________

8. Forgiveness Prayer (Matt. 6:12, 14-15). If you are ready, insert the name of the person you have chosen to forgive into the following prayer of forgiveness. You may want to say it in your own words but be sure to include all the elements.

Forgiveness Prayer:

Father God, Your Word says that to be forgiven, I must forgive. And so, I come to You in the name of Jesus, in obedience and love, and I bring (name) _____ before You. I cancel _____ debt to me (e.g., apology, change of behavior, humiliation, justice, restitution, money, repent, seek forgiveness, suffer, etc.). I choose to forgive this hurt against me, and I ask that You not hold these sins against _____ on my account. I release _____ from any desire on my part to see _____ punished. In fact, as You have told me to do, I bless _____ in Your Son’s name, Jesus. You know _____ desires, needs, and hurts. You know what would bless _____. And so, I ask that You pour out Your love and healing to _____ and bring _____ Your highest good, because Your name is Good and Love, and You are not willing that any should perish. Now also, Father, please heal my heart and set me free to love _____ as You do. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, I pray. Amen.

9. The Truth sets you free (John 8:36): Pray and ask God to show you this person as He sees them. Ask Him to show you what is true. One of the great mysteries of God is that He loves the perpetrator as much as the victim. Write down any insights God gives to you as you pray.

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

10. Is there anything God wants you to do to heal this relationship? Check with your counselor or discipleship group before you take any action.

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

FOOTNOTES:

[1] Adapted from Michael Dye’s The Genesis Process: For Change Groups Books 1 and 2 Individual Workbook (Michael Dye/Double Eagle Industries, 2012), pp. 123-133.

[2] Ibid., pp. 123-124.

[3] Ibid., pp. 126-128.

[4] Ibid., pg. 129.

[5] Ibid., pp. 127-128, 130.

[6] Ibid., pg. 128.

[7] Ibid.

[8] Adapted from Ibid., pp. 129 -133.

How Can I Overcome Loneliness? (Video) Real Solutions to Real Problems – Part 4

This is the fourth video in a series entitled, “Real Solutions to Real Problems.” In this presentation you will learn from the Bible several transforming principles for overcoming loneliness.

All Scriptures are from the New King James Version Bible unless otherwise noted. Digital images are used with permission from FreeBibleimages.org, Goodsalt.com, Good News Productions International and College Press Publishing, John Paul Stanley / YoPlace.com, Sweet Publishing / FreeBibleimages.org or they are creative common licenses.

How Do I Climb Out of the Pit of Discouragement? (Video) Real Solutions to Real Problems – Part 3

This is the third video in a series entitled, “Real Solutions to Real Problems.” In this presentation you will learn from the Bible several transforming principles for climbing out of the pit of discouragement.

All Scriptures are from the New King James Version Bible unless otherwise noted. Digital images are used with permission from FreeBibleimages.org, Goodsalt.com, John Paul Stanley / YoPlace.com, or they are creative common licenses.

How can I overcome loneliness? Part 2

“But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me.” 2 Timothy 4:17a

We are looking at different causes and cures for loneliness in 2 Timothy 4 where the apostle Paul is writing to a young pastor named Timothy. Paul was near the end of his life, and he was having to deal with loneliness. The first cause of loneliness we learned was the transitions of life (2 Timothy 4:6-8). The cure for this was to utilize our time wisely (2 Timothy 4:13).

The second cause for loneliness is SEPARATION FROM LOVED ONES (2 Timothy 4:9-12, 21). When we are separated from our friends or from our family (because of career, COVID, military deployment, health, or any reason) – that can cause loneliness.

Paul says to Timothy, Be diligent to come to me quickly.” (2 Timothy 4:9). Then Paul mentions his best friends, but none of them are with him except Luke: 10 for Demas has forsaken me, having loved this present world, and has departed for Thessalonica — Crescens for Galatia, Titus for Dalmatia. 11 Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for ministry. 12 And Tychicus I have sent to Ephesus.” (2 Timothy 4:10-12). Paul is in a foreign country in a prison, and he is saying, “I miss these people.” These were his best friends, his previous traveling companions. Paul was a “people person,” andhe loved to be among people. But now at the end of his life he experiences the loneliness of separation because his friends are in other countries.

Today you can contact people in other parts of the world using various electronic devices, but Paul did not have access to those devices. It took a long time to reach someone. Three times in this chapter Paul asks Timothy to come to him (2 Timothy 4:9, 13, 21). Why is he saying this? Because he may not be around much longer, and he really wants to see his dear friends.

Whom do you need to call or visit? Whom do you need to write a letter of appreciation to? You need to do it now while there is still time. Help relieve someone’s loneliness of separation by reaching out to them.

The second way to deal with loneliness is to RECOGNIZE GOD’S PRESENCE (2 Timothy 4:17a). Even though most of Paul’s friends were far away from him, the Lord was not. Although his companions abandoned him when he gave his first defense before the imperial court (2 Timothy 4:16b), 1 the Lord did not. Paul writes, “But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me.” (2 Timothy 4:17a). While Paul stood before his accusers and prosecutors, “the Lord stood with” him. God gave Paul the strength he needed to fight the good fight and finish the race and keep the faith even though others had forsaken him. God’s presence gave him all the support he needed.

While it does help to have others supporting us, it is also true that people cannot always be there for us twenty-four hours a day. Where is God when we are lonely? He is right next to us to give us all the support we need. God said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5). There is no place where God is not. He is everywhere at every time, and we can constantly talk to Him. Prayer is a great tool to use during lonely times. Occasionally, when we are feeling lonely, our instinct is to turn inward and revel in self-pity. Like the apostle Paul, we can learn that loneliness is a signal that it is time for us to get better acquainted with our precious Savior Who replaces our loneliness with His loving presence.

Prayer: Precious Lord Jesus, all of us go through times of loneliness and self-pity. During the coronavirus pandemic, we have experienced prolonged periods of separation from loved ones. Like the apostle Paul, some of us have also been abandoned by friends when we needed their support the most. As best we know how, we want to thank You, Lord, for these times when we feel lonely because they can remind us to get better acquainted with You. By Your grace, help us learn to talk to You when we feel all alone or abandoned. Because You are our Refuge, we can safely share our most intimate thoughts and feelings with You, knowing You still love and accept us. You understand what it feels like to be alone or abandoned. Your presence can give all the support we need when we find ourselves struggling with loneliness. When we are weak, Your presence makes us strong. In Your ever-present name we pray, Lord Jesus. Amen.

ENDNOTES:

1. Robert W. Wilkin; J. B. Bond; Gary Derickson; Brad Doskocil; Zane Hodges; Dwight Hunt; Shawn Leach. The Grace New Testament Commentary: Revised Edition (Grace Evangelical Society, Kindle Edition, 2019), pg. 1216.

How can I overcome loneliness? Part 1

“Bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas when you come—and the books, especially the parchments.” 2 Timothy 4:13

We live in a world of 7.9 billion people, 1 many living right on top of each other in crowed cities. We are wired together through incredible communication devices. Yet, despite all these circumstances that you think would inspire community, more people than ever feel alone in the world today. Research has shown that loneliness is especially on the rise among older teens and young adults due to the coronavirus pandemic. 2

Loneliness is one of the most miserable feelings a person can have. You may feel that no one loves you or even cares if you exist. Can you be wealthy and lonely? Ask the Donald Trump’s and Bill Gates’s of the world. Can you be popular and lonely? Ask the Kim Kardashian’s and Dwayne Johnson’s of society. Can you be beautiful and lonely? Ask the beauty queens who have attempted suicide. Can you be married and lonely? Ask the people who marry because of loneliness and then get divorced a few years later for the same reason.

All of us experience loneliness at one time or another, but there are specific causes and cures for it. Sometimes we bring loneliness on ourselves and other times we are in situations that are uncontrollable. The apostle Paul found himself in the latter as he wrote his second letter to a young pastor named Timothy. In 2 Timothy, Paul was a dying old man as he wrote from prison in Rome to Timothy and urged the younger man to visit him because he was lonely.

For the next few days, we are going to look at the causes and cures of loneliness. The first cause is THE TRANSITIONS OF LIFE (2 Timothy 4:6-8). Life is full of transitions and stages. Growing older is a series of changes, and any change can produce loneliness. We are lonely when we are born, and we cry until we are cuddled. We are lonely when we attend our first school or get a new job. Moving to a new community can be a lonely experience as can entering retirement. The death of a loved one is lonely. COVID has been a huge transition for the entire world which has resulted in many experiencing more loneliness.

The apostle Paul is now in the final transition of life, and he knows his time is short. He is feeling alone. “For I am already being poured out as a drink offering, and the time of my departure is at hand.” (2 Timothy 4:6). Paul is saying, “Timothy, I don’t have much time left. I may be executed by Nero soon or I may die from old age.”

As Paul spends his last days alone, he says 7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8 Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing.” (2 Timothy 4:7-8). Paul is saying, “I have fulfilled my ministry and now I am ready to receive my reward of ruling with Christ along with all who have loved His appearing.” The first cause of loneliness is simply the transitions of life. Any new experience we must face, can be lonely.

There are healthy ways and there are self-defeating ways to deal with loneliness. One self-defeating way is to become a workaholic. You burn the candle at both ends and end up not being nearly as bright as you thought. It takes its toll on you physically and emotionally.

Some people try to overcome loneliness through materialism. They buy everything around them. They tell themselves, “If I can just get those things I want, then I will be happy.” But things don’t satisfy. We need people. We need acceptance and love, not things. Some people have an affair – they look outside their marriage to cure their loneliness. But this only leads to more pain and shame. Others may turn to alcohol or drugs. Some people lose themselves in afantasy world by reading novels or watching pornography online. Others do absolutely nothing but sit around and have a pity party. These responses to loneliness are self-defeating. They only create more loneliness and pain.

The apostle Paul did none of these self-defeating things. He did several things to overcome his loneliness which are just as relevant today as they were when Paul went through his days of loneliness. The first cure is UTILIZE YOUR TIME WISELY (2 Timothy 4:13). Make the best of your tough situation. Resist the temptation to do nothing. Loneliness can paralyze us if we just sit around and do nothing. If life gives you a lemon, think of creative ways to make lemonade. This is what Paul did.

Bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas when you come—and the books, especially the parchments.” (2 Timothy 4:13). Paul refused to sit around and feel sorry for himself. He didn’t complain, “God, is this what I get for thirty years of ministry? Is this my reward for starting many churches, for being the person most responsible for taking the gospel to the Roman world? Is this what I get – to die in a damp and dark prison in Rome all alone?” No, Paul did not throw a pity party. Instead, he says, “If I am going to be alone, I might as well be comfortable. I’m going to make the best of a bad situation. Bring my cloak so I can at least be warm.”

Often lonely people don’t take care of themselves. They don’t eat right, they don’t exercise, and they ignore their personal needs. My grandparents were just the opposite. They were constantly walking, reading, and serving others. That is probably why my grandmother lived to be over a hundred and my grandfather lived to be almost ninety-nine.

It is important to pay attention to your physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. Learn to take care of yourself. When Paul admonished husbands to love their wives as they love their own bodies, he wrote, “For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.” (Ephesians 5:29). Other than those with mental illness, people naturally take care of their physical bodies. 3 Men are to care for their wives just as they care for their own physical bodies. This is precisely what “the Lord” Jesus “does for the church” – He nourishes and cherishes it.

Are we taking care of our physical bodies? Are we eating properly, exercising, getting adequate sleep, and participating in activities that are life-giving? During times of loneliness, we can easily neglect our personal needs.

Paul did not ignore his personal needs. He says, “Bring my coat and my books, and I will take advantage of this solitary time; I will use it for writing and study time.” This was a big change of pace for Paul because he was a doer, a church-planter. More than anything else, he wanted to be in the Roman coliseum preaching the gospel to hundreds instead of in a prison studying. But sometimes God can use loneliness for our good. If Paul had been in the coliseum he would have been preaching, but God left him in prison and we got part of the New Testament instead, which has impacted far more lives for Jesus Christ! You know, probably the only way God could get Paul to sit still was to put him in prison. And Paul’s response was, “If I cannot be where the action is, I will create action right here.”

Since COVID restrictions were put in place early in 2020, the Lord led me to begin this online ministry to the world. Rather than moping around and feeling sorry for myself, I asked the Lord to show me how to utilize my time and talents for Him. And He led me to start See You in Heaven online to multiply disciples of Jesus around the world until all hear His gospel of grace.

What does the Lord want you to do with the time and talents He has given you? Take time to ask Him and wait quietly for His response. Write down what He impresses you to do. I believe we do not have much time left here on earth before Jesus returns for His church. Let’s focus on His leading and use our time and talents in a way that honors Him and fulfills His purpose for our lives.

Prayer: Lord Jesus, thank You so much for the example of the apostle Paul. Even though he was facing a huge transition in his life, he did not sit around and feel sorry for himself. Instead, he took care of his personal needs and utilized his time and talents for You. As a result, we now have a part of the New Testament that continues to change countless lives for Your glory. Like Paul, help us to take care of our personal needs so we can be more available to be used by You to impact this world for Jesus Christ. All of us have time and talents that You have given us. Please show us how to best utilize them all for Your honor and glory. In Your mighty name we pray, Lord Jesus Amen.

ENDNOTES:

1. Retrieved on September 4, 2021, from https://www.worldometers.info/ .

2. Retrieved on September 4, 2021, from Colleen Walsh’s February 17, 2021, article entitled, “Young adults hardest hit by loneliness during pandemic,” The Harvard Gazette.

3. J. B. Bond, Robert Wilkin; Gary Derickson; Brad Doskocil; Zane Hodges; Dwight Hunt; Shawn Leach. The Grace New Testament Commentary: Revised Edition (Grace Evangelical Society, Kindle Edition, 2019), pg. 1067.

How do I climb out of the pit of discouragement? Part 6

And there he went into a cave, and spent the night in that place; and behold, the word of the Lord came to him, and He said to him, ‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’ ” I Kings 19:9

After his incredible victory on Mt. Carmel the prophet Elijah descended into the pit of discouragement following a death threat from wicked Queen Jezebel (I Kings 18:20-19:2). In response to Jezebel, Elijah isolated himself in the wilderness and asked God to take his life (I Kings 19:3-4). Although Elijah had plunged into the depths of discouragement, God had not given up on him. The Lord was slowly bringing His prophet up out of this pit of discouragement by providing rest and food for him through an angel (I Kings 19:5-7a). But Elijah also needed to spend time in the Lord’s presence to get back up on his feet, so the Lord gave him a journey to take to Mt. Horeb about 200 miles away.

After traveling forty days and nights on foot, Elijah arrived at Mt. Horeb “and there he went into a cave, and spent the night in that place; and behold, the word of the Lord came to him, and He said to him, ‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’ ” (I Kings 19:9). What method of communication does the Lord use here? A question. Why does the Lord ask a question He already knows the answer to? To get Elijah to share his feelings.

And Elijah answered truthfully: “I have been very zealous for the Lord God of hosts; for the children of Israel have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars, and killed Your prophets with the sword. I alone am left; and they seek to take my life.” (I Kings 19:10). Elijah is saying, “Lord, I’m angry. I’m the only one serving You among Your people. The rest don’t care about You. I’m all alone and I’m afraid they’re going to kill me!” God was not shocked by Elijah’s feelings. He allows His prophet to let off steam. This is our next principle for climbing out of the pit of discouragement: GIVE YOUR FRUSTRATIONS TO THE LORD (I Kings 19:9-10). Verbalizing our feelings can clarify our thinking. Stuffing emotions can distort our spiritual perspective.

There are at least six emotions that Elijah has been feeling since Jezebel threatened his life:

– Fear: “And when he saw that, he arose and ran for his life.” (I Kings 19:3a).

– Hopelessness: “And he prayed that he might die, and said, ‘It is enough! Now, Lord, take my life…’ ” (I Kings 19:4a).

– Guilt: “… for I am no better than my fathers!” (I Kings 19:4b).

– Anger/Resentment: “I have been very zealous for the Lord God of hosts; for the children of Israel have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars, and killed Your prophets with the sword.” (I Kings 19:10a).

Loneliness: “I alone am left.” (I Kings 19:10b).

Worry: “and they seek to take my life.” (I Kings 19:10c).

When we combine fear, hopelessness, guilt, anger/resentment, loneliness and worry, and keep them all pent up inside us, we are asking for discouragement! So God draws these pent up emotions out of Elijah by asking a question. He says, “Elijah, what’s frustrating you? What’s eating you up?”

When we are discouraged, this is exactly what we need to do – give our frustrations to the Lord. Unfortunately, many Christians have been taught that feelings are wrong. “Good Christians do not feel afraid, angry, depressed, hopeless, lonely, resentful, or worried,” they are told. Or worse, they are taught that their feelings are actually demons. “You have a demon of fear… anger… depression… guilt… hopelessness… loneliness… resentment or worry.” Their feelings are spiritualized by well-intentioned, but misguided believers.

What these misconceptions have done is keep Christians from healing their wounds. God knows that we must feel to heal. This is why He recorded the writings of King David in the Psalms. Even though King David was an adulterer and a murderer, God still assessed his life “as a man after My own heart” (Acts 13:22). What was it about this man that led God to speak so highly of him? I believe one reason God said this about David is because he was very honest and open before the Lord. And God was so impressed with David’s honesty and vulnerability in the Psalms that He refers to him as a man after His own heart.

How can we give our frustrations to the Lord? Like David, we need to talk to the Lord about them. If you are not sure how to verbalize your feelings to the Lord, pray some of the Psalms back to God that express…

– Anger/Resentment (Psalm 4, 5, 6, 10, 13, 17, 35, 37, 42, 52, 54, 58, 69, 70, 79, 83, 109, 137, 140)

– Fear (Psalm 3, 4, 9, 16, 23, 27, 31, 32, 34, 46, 56, 62, 91, 112, 118, 121)

– Grief/Sadness (Psalm 6, 23, 25, 30, 42, 59, 61, 86, 116, 118, 147)

– Guilt (Psalm 25, 32, 25, 40, 51, 85, 86, 103, 130

– Hopelessness (Psalm 5, 25, 27, 33, 34, 37, 39, 40, 42, 43, 46, 52, 57, 60, 62, 65, 71, 91, 94, 108)

– Loneliness (Psalm 17, 23, 25, 27, 39, 68, 73, 102, 142, 147)

– Worry (Psalm 4, 9, 16, 23, 25, 27, 31, 34, 40, 42, 46, 55, 56, 61, 62, 84, 91, 94, 103, 112, 116, 121, 139, 145)

You may want to write down your prayers to God which can help you release your emotions to Him. Carrying unprocessed feelings inside us can contribute to our discouragement and stress.

Early in life, our brains discerned if the world was safe or dangerous. If our brains determined that the world was dangerous, it created protective personalities to keep us from being hurt. So instead of learning to trust others and God, we concluded that we did not need God or others to avoid being hurt. Our tendency is to avoid taking risks and being vulnerable before God and other people. But this only leads to more discouragement and stress.

God understands this and He wants to set us free from these protective walls we have created for ourselves. We can learn from Elijah the importance of giving our frustrations to God. We do this by being vulnerable before Him. The Bible tells us, “Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.” (Psalm 62:8). We can trust the Lord with our feelings because He is “a refuge for us.” He is safe to be transparent and vulnerable with. He is benevolent and understanding. He sympathizes with our weaknesses (Hebrews 4:15).

Prayer: Precious heavenly Father, thank You for asking Elijah what he was doing in that cave. Elijah’s response showed that he needed to release all the pent up emotions he had been carrying since Queen Jezebel threatened his life. Like Elijah, we can stuff our emotions down inside us and experience discouragement and distress as a result. Lord, please show us if there is anything in our lives that we need to release to You. You already know the feelings we have and You are eager to hear us talk to You about them. How we feel does not change Your love for us. Some of us have learned to avoid our feelings because it was not safe to identify them or share them with others when growing up. Help us see that we are safe in Your presence now. We can be vulnerable before You with our emotions just like Elijah was. In the gracious name of Jesus we pray. Amen.  

Connecting in a Disconnected World of Covid (Video)

Although this video was prepared for a church anniversary in the Philippines, its biblical principles can apply to any culture. We will not only look at the challenges of connecting with other people during this age of COVID-19, we will also turn to the Bible to discover how we can connect with one another in more effective ways. If you are feeling all alone and without hope, this video is for you.

How can we endure difficult times? Part 2

“When Jesus had spoken these words, He went out with His disciples over the Brook Kidron, where there was a garden, which He and His disciples entered.” John 18:1

We are learning in John 18:1-12 how we can endure difficult times. Last time we discovered the first way is to learn about the love of Christ (John 18:1a). The second way to endure difficult times is in the last half of verse 1. “When Jesus had spoken these words, He went out with His disciples over the Brook Kidron, where there was a garden, which He and His disciples entered.” (John 18:1b). Christ crossed over the Brook Kidron to go to “a garden.” This is not necessarily a reference to a place where flowers or vegetables are grown, but to an orchard where olive trees are growing on the side of the Mount of Olives. 1 

John is referring to the Garden of Gethsemane (cf. Matthew 26:36; Mark 14:32). The word “Gethsemane” (Gethsēmani) means an “oil press” 2  or a place where the olives are pressed and pressured so that the oil would come out. Jesus was pressured spiritually like never before in the garden that night. John leaves out the agony of Gethsemane where Jesus fervently prayed to the Father concerning the cross (cf. Matthew 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39-43). His sweat became like blood (cf. Luke 22:44). Why does John leave this out? Because his purpose is to show Jesus in complete control over the situation. Christ is presented as the Victor in John’s account, not the Victim.

This garden was probably something some wealthy citizen of Jerusalem owned. They didn’t just have free land outside of Jerusalem in those days. All the gardens that were around Jerusalem were owned by wealthy citizens in Jerusalem. They didn’t have big gardens in Jerusalem for two reasons: there wasn’t enough land and the law forbid them from putting manure or fertilizer on the ground in Jerusalem. So even if you did have a garden in Jerusalem, it would not grow anything. So all the wealthy citizens would buy these gardens outside of town and they would go out there to relax. 3  We don’t know the name of the person who owned this garden. But whoever he or she was, they lent this garden to Jesus during the hour of His greatest need. I find it intriguing that God does not tell us the name of this significant person who ministered to our Lord at this time. Perhaps the Lord Jesus will reveal this person to us in heaven.

Nonetheless, the main observation here is that Jesus went to Gethsemane to prepare for Calvary. He prepared for His suffering (arrest, trials, and crucifixion) by spending time in prayer with His heavenly Father. So the second way to endure difficult times is to LOOK TO THE LORD IN PRAYER (John 18:1b; cf. Luke 22:39-42).

Do you have a quiet place where you can get alone with the Lord to pray? Dr. Tony Evans said, “Pain is always an invitation to pray.” God allows pain in our lives to cause us to depend more on Him in prayer. Where do you go when you are in pain? Do you go to the internet? To a bottle of booze? To drugs? To a boyfriend or girlfriend? To the Lotto (lottery)? To your job or ministry? Where do you go? Jesus turned to His heavenly Father in prayer.

John tells us that “Jesus often met there with His disciples” (18:2b). Christ went there often with His disciples to pray. This is where He got His endurance. If we are going to endure trials in a way that honors Jesus Christ, we must make it a habit to talk to Him in prayer.

The Bible tells us when we face tough times, to “Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us” (Psalm 62:8). When God allows pain in our lives, He invites us to trust Him and pour out our hearts before Him. Why? Because “God is a refuge for us.” He is a safe Person to share our hurts and struggles with because He understands and sympathizes, having gone through similar struggles (Hebrews 4:15). He will not tell others what we share with Him. He will not mock us or betray us. He has our best interests in mind. Go to Him in prayer because He loves you and cares for you more than any other person in the universe. As we give Him our burdens, He will give us renewed strength to endure the trials we are facing.

Prayer: Father God, there is no better way to face Calvary (suffering) than to spend time in Gethsemane talking to You in prayer. Thank Youthat we can talk to You anytime, anywhere, about anything. And You are always available to listen and understand. Lord Jesus, no one understands our hurts and struggles better than You. You know what it feels like to be abandoned, alone, misunderstood, rejected, unfairly accused, and unloved. You are our Refuge. Our secrets and struggles are safe with You. Thank You for reminding us that You also know what it is like to endure suffering victoriously. Please lead us to face our difficulties victoriously with Your strength as we lean into You through prayer. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray. Amen.

ENDNOTES:

1. J. Carl Laney, Moody Gospel John Commentary (Chicago: Moody Press, 1992), pg. 316.

2. A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature, compiled by Walter Bauer, trans. and adapted by William F. Arndt and F. Wilbur Gingrich, 2nd ed., rev. and augmented by F. Wilbur Gingrich and Frederick W. Danker (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1979), pg. 153.

3. William Barclay, William Barclay’s Daily Study Bible, Commentary on John, 1956-1959, vs. 18:1-14. https://www.studylight.org/commentaries/dsb/john-18.html.

4. Tony Evans, March 10, 2019 post on Facebook.

How can we be effective witnesses to a hostile world? Part 4

“But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me.” John 15:26

From Jesus’ instruction to His eleven believing disciples, we are learning how we can be effective witnesses to a hostile world. So far we have discovered we can be effective witnesses to a hostile world when we…

– Realize that we will face the same conflict with the world that Jesus did (John 15:18-19).

– Recall what Jesus has already taught us (John 15:20).

– Recognize that the world is not opposed to us personally, but to our relationship with Christ (John 15:21-25).

The fourth way to be an effective witness to a hostile world is to REMAIN IN VITAL CONTACT WITH CHRIST THROUGH THE HOLY SPIRIT (John 15:26-27). Jesus knew that when His disciples would be faced with the hatred of the world, they may be tempted to escape from it or remain silent about the gospel. After all, the world can be very brutal toward Christians. The world does not care about your personal well-being. Even though the world would be antagonistic to the disciples’ ministry and message, they were to bear witness of Jesus.

Christ reminds them (and us) that they would not be left alone to fulfill their responsibilities when He goes to the Father in heaven. There would be two witnesses from God to the world. Who is the first witness that Jesus mentions in verse 26? “But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me.” (John 15:26). The first witness is the Holy Spirit. Jesus teaches us several things about Him. He is “the Helper” (ho paraklētos) or one “called alongside to help.” 1  He is the One who will assist, empower, and encourage the disciples to be a witness for Christ in a hostile world. If we try to overcome the hostility of the world with our own strength, it will be one huge struggle laden with failure. Satan will oppose us through the world’s system and we are not wise enough or strong enough to overcome him on our own. We must abide in Jesus and yield to the Holy Spirit’s control in our lives to experience victory over the hostility of the world.

To be effective witnesses, we must remain in vital contact with Christ through His Holy Spirit and the Word. That’s why Jesus refers to the Holy Spirit as “the Spirit of truth.” He tells the truth about Christ through the truth of God’s Word (cf. John 14:6; 17:17). Jesus says, “He will testify of Me.” The primary ministry of the Holy Spirit is to testify about Jesus through God’s Word. The Spirit’s ministry is not to testify about Himself or you or me. His purpose is to magnify Jesus Christ! If a church or ministry is not magnifying the Person and work of Jesus Christ on the cross, it is doubtful that church or ministry is being led by the Holy Spirit. If the Spirit magnifies Jesus Christ, then His disciples should do the same.

Notice that verse 26 refers to all three Persons of the Godhead. “The Helper” or “Spirit of truth” will be sent by Jesus “from the Father,” and the Spirit will also “testify of” Jesus. The Holy Spirit will empower the second witness.

Who is the second witness? “And you also will bear witness, because you have been with Me from the beginning.” (John 15:27). The word “you” refers to the disciples in this context, but it also refers to all believers since that time, including you and me today. The word “also” indicates that the witness of the disciples is important. It shows that the disciples and the Spirit together would “bear witness” to Christ. The word translated “bear witness” (μαρτυρεῖτε) is a courtroom term that refers to speaking the truth. What would happen if you took the witness stand in a court of law and never said anything? The judge would hold you in contempt of the court. So this term demands that we speak the truth. Christ is saying that we are to tell the truth about Jesus, so people can be saved.  What is the truth about Jesus that saves people from an eternity in hell?

That He died for our sins and rose from the dead (I Corinthians 15:1-6). Why did Jesus have to die? Because all people have sinned against God (Romans 3:23) with their thoughts, words, and actions. Our sin separates (“death”) us from God (Romans 6:23) because God is holy and righteous and cannot be around our sin. Therefore, God sent His only Son, Jesus Christ, to pay the penalty for all our sin when He died on the cross and rose from the dead, proving that He is God (Romans 1:3-4; I Corinthians 15:1-6). Jesus now invites everyone to believe or trust in Him alone for His gift of everlasting life: “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16).

Jesus is not inviting us to be baptized or go to church because He never said, “whoever is baptized or goes to church should not perish but have everlasting life.” Nor is Christ inviting us to pray every day or to live a good life because He never said, “whoever prays every day or lives a good life should not perish but have everlasting life.” Jesus is simply inviting us to believe or trust in Him alone because He said, “Whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”

No amount of our good works can save us from our sins because they are all like “dirty rags” in the sight of a holy God (Isaiah 64:6).  We must trust in Christ alone as our only hope of heaven and He will give us eternal life and a future home in heaven.

As disciples, we need God’s Spirit for empowerment and the Spirit needs us as a means of expression. Why were the disciples chosen to be witnesses? Because they “have been with” Jesus “from the beginning” of His ministry when He was baptized by John the Baptist (John 15:27; cf. 1:29ff). These men would be credible witnesses to the Person of Christ because they had been loyal to Him. They could have abandoned the Lord when persecution intensified, and they did for a short time, but then they came back to Him and He used them to change the known world.

Two things in verses 26-27 are foundational to be an effective witness for Christ. 2  First, we must clearly witness. Those of us who have been richly blessed by the grace of God for salvation are compelled to clearly share this grace with others. We must focus on the finished work of Christ on the cross as the basis of salvation (John 19:30), not our good works (Romans 4:5; Ephesians 2:8-9). Since salvation is a free gift (John 4:10-14; Romans 3:24; 6:23b; Ephesians 2:8-9; Revelation 22:17), we must emphasize faith alone in Christ alone as the means of salvation (John 3:15-16, 36; 6:40, 47; 11:25-26; 20:31; Romans 3:21-4:25; Galatians 2:16; I Timothy 1:16; I John 5:1, 13; et al.), not a “faith plus” formula. The more we understand and experience the grace of God, the more passionate we will be to share the clear gospel of grace with the lost.

Second, we never witness to others alone. The Holy Spirit is always with us and in us to give us a power that is not our own. When we are afraid to speak up for Christ, He can give us the boldness we need with those who may intimidate us (cf. Acts 4:29-31). When we don’t know what to say, He can give us the words that our listeners need to hear (cf. Matthew 10:19-20). It is His responsibility to persuade people through the Word of God to believe or trust in Christ alone as their only way to heaven (John 16:7-11). But it is our responsibility to yield to His control (Ephesians 5:18).            

Prayer: Lord Jesus, thank You so much for sending God the Holy Spirit from God the Father to be our Helper in witnessing to a hostile world. I never ever have to be alone when I tell others about Jesus because the Holy Spirit permanently indwells me. And when I feel afraid of what others will think, say, or do if I share Christ with them, the Spirit of truth gives me the boldness and the words to share with them unashamedly. So many times I lack insight when sharing the gospel with others, but You intervene and bring to my remembrance the truth that the listener needs to hear. Thank You Holy Spirit for the power You give to me when I yield to Your control. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

ENDNOTES:

1. J. Carl Laney, Moody Gospel John Commentary (Chicago: Moody Press, 1992), pg. 282.

2. Ibid., pg. 283.